Love, Envy, and Other Ponderings While Nursing My Cramping Triceps

Me Right Now

It seems pretty comical, doesn't it? Cramping triceps? It is, honestly. I feel like I've never felt those muscles there do anything before, much less cramp up. I'm almost proud of myself for going that hard. It was during my third (and last) circuit, during the fourth tricep dip, suddenly I felt a tightening of my arms and then OWWWWW the pain hit. I frantically tried to stretch it out; I tried to remember the procedure for side pain. "Do I stretch toward or away from the pain? Toward? MAYBE NOT. Away? MAYBE NOT." All I could to was pace up and down the small space I made for myself in the room I share with The Daughter until the shooting pain seemed to subside to a dull ache. I finished my set promising myself to not "go too hard" and not to make my injury worse. I survived my set, and after logging my exercise, I decided to decompress a little while longer and check my Facebook for notifications I know aren't there. 

So here's the thing that gets my goat, has anyone else noticed the alarming trend of couples going on expensive trips together? All over my newsfeed; Vegas, California, even fricken' Australia! AUSTRALIA?! A FOREIGN FRICKEN' COUNTRY?! I can't even afford to buy a new bra (RIP Lace Black Strapless), and there are people out there, my age, who are going on these big, expensive trips with their sig oths! "Oh, Tee, you're just jealous" UMM YEAH, OBVIOUSLY! However, you all should've known I would be complaining in my blog posts; it's what I do. 

I know, I know

Let's get down to the root of it. Why am I jealous of these guys? Well first of all, I'm not satisfied with my life at the moment. Let's be fair, though. Who actually is? Don't get me wrong, I have a great family, and even a boyfriend. I'm not saying those things don't mean anything, it's just that... don't you want more to your life? Like a job? The ability to go where you want when you want? A new bra as soon as you need one so you don't have to get stabbed by the underwire every time you put your arm down? I'm not discounting my blessings, just wishing for more of them, I guess. To be completely honest with you all, I have these thoughts pretty often. So what can be done about feeling like this? Well, let's put everything into perspective:

PROS AND CONS OF NOT GOING WITH DKK (BOYFRIEND) TO AUSTRALIA

PRO: I'm not sharing a life-changing experience with someone who may not be in my life forever

CON: I'm not sharing a life-changing experience with someone who may be in my life forever

PRO: I'm saving money

CON: I'm not actually saving money because I have no money to save

PRO: I don't have to deal with all the crazy wildlife Australia is notorious for

CON: No con. Ain't nobody got time for poisonous reptiles and flying foxes

Exactly

See! The pros have it! Now aren't we glad we made that list to help us out?! In all seriousness, it's definitely hard to see your peers have all the things you think you want. But when I think about it, none of those things would ever be on my personal radar, anyway. I wasn't raised in a culture of privilege. I don't know what it's like to "live for now". I want to work toward a goal, not wander aimlessly through part-time jobs in order to save up only enough for the next trip, as is the current trend right now among our generation. I'm not saying we should worry more about the future than the present, but instant gratification isn't the way, either. I hope we can all find a balance in our lives, including me. 

Progress: Feeling less sorry for myself than I did yesterday. And three-full push-ups. Yay me! 

With Love,

Tee